Letting Go


  • Set a limit that’s reasonable for you, such as a period of time or a dollar amount, to spend on the dream, Cutts advises. Once you get to that point, if you’ve seen no results, it may be time to try something different.
  • And, yes, naysayers are typically available and ready to oppose you; however there are trustworthy people you should turn to. But you must listen, especially if what they’re saying goes against your pursuits. Sanders suggests, “If family members and close friends are telling you you’re neglecting certain aspects of your life, this may be a time for you to postpone or alter your course.”
  • The matter at hand
    But just because you’ve called it quits doesn’t mean you’ve given up. Farmer recommends taking a broader look at what the dream represents. He says some may want, for example, a platform by which they can influence others, but the initial attempt at that, say, writing books, may not materialize in spite of their best efforts. They may be disappointed that their book deal fell through; however, influencing others is the actual dream. “So, explore other possibilities for getting there,” he suggests.

    It’s also important to note that failure often teaches lessons that can lead to great success. A failed business may provide insights for starting a larger endeavor; a failed marriage can provide learning experiences that lead to stronger personal relationships; a foreclosure can catalyze a renewed desire to create financial stability through more prudent financial habits.

    You may not immediately know what greater thing can come out of your decision to walk away, but don’t let that stop you from cutting the cord, advises Farmer. “Sometimes you have to let go of it to see it more clearly.”

    You meant well
    It’s also important not to take the failure personally, says Alduan Tartt, a licensed psychologist based in Decatur, Georgia. “The business or marriage failed–you didn’t,” he points out. Sure, you should take responsibility for your mistakes and consider

    (Continued on page 5)


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