For women wanting more out of romance, a new guide will hit shelves that brings back classic, old-school advice.
With Valentine’s Day approaching, many are reflecting on their approaches to love. In her second work, integral coach and author Nokulinda Mkhize will offer readers a bout of “Kitchen Wisdom” to help women thrive in the romantic field.
In “Kitchen Wisdom: What We Hate to Hear but Need to Know About Men and Romance,” Mkhize goes back to the tried-and-true methods of finding love that were once ingrained across Diasporic communities. Mkhize’s work as a sangoma (healer) introduced her to countless women suffering from the same romantic woes, leading her to create this guide to remind women of the golden rules of dating and securing the right partner.
“This book comes from my observation as a sangoma of 17 years that many women were trying to juggle being successful modern women while wishing to find a decent and nurturing adult romantic relationship with a man,” Mkhize explained in a press release shared with BLACK ENTERPRISE.
Mkhize continued, “Women are complaining that “amadoda awayekeki” (men are irresistible), but at the same time, modern romance is bringing them enormous pain and heartache. This confusion leads women to make terrible compromises to secure a man’s affections. Just because we are modern in our lives, does not mean our hearts are modern in their feelings.”
According to Mkhize, the modern rules of the game of love have only led to loneliness. Now, she encourages women to take back their power through old-fashioned yet timeless principles such as “Never Chase A Man” and “Do Not Do Wife Things Before You Are The Wife.”
The author added, “A lot of the advice about men that we heard in the kitchen from the women in our lives—remains true even today. They’ve spotted the patterns, learned the lessons, and emerged wiser.”
For the career woman who cannot find the perfect match that meets her ambition to the hopeless romantic who always seems to find jerks, this book aims to restore hope for those over the games. Furthermore, the novel amplifies the importance of community among women. Mkhize also emphasizes that friendship and support are critical to striking a balance in life.
Reminding women of the words of their mothers and grandmothers, “Kitchen Wisdom” is a book filled with lessons and old-school remedies to affirm oneself while finding a deserved love.
“Kitchen Wisdom” is available for pre-orders and downloadable on Amazon Kindle. For those in Johannesburg, South Africa, Mkhize is hosting a special Galentine’s date to celebrate the book’s launch.
Nokulinda Mkhize is a sangoma—or healer—author, speaker, and mother of four. She has been practicing as an isangoma since 2008 and is an authority on African cultures, Indigenous spiritual knowledge, and cosmologies. She is also an accredited integral coach, qualified through the UCT Graduate School of Business.
Combining her experience as an isangoma, academic knowledge, creativity, and media expertise, she has shared and taught extensively on ancestral, cultural, and spiritual practices in modern professional, personal, and community contexts. This experience and expertise led to the publication of her first book, Ancestory: Ancient Lessons for Modern Life, in 2022. She pioneered the ever-evolving niche for isangoma, including using digital resources to expand the scope of practice of ubungoma, or divination.